New Species Of Giant Jellyfish Washes Up In Australia

This is an unclassified species of giant jellyfish that recently washed up on an Australian beach. Majestic, isn't it? "It looks like a giant puddle of vomit." IT SURE F***ING DOES.

Dr Lisa-ann Gershwin, of Australia's CSIRO government agency, said that scientists had known about the species for a while but had not yet classified it. She described the specimen as a "truly magnificent animal". This species was part of the Lion's Mane group, she said. These jellyfish "look like a dinner plate with a mop hanging underneath - they have a really raggedy look to them", she said. It was one of a "species I've known about for a while but it's not yet named and classified", she said. "We're very eager to know more about it."

Sure, maybe a "truly magnificent animal" in the water, but on a beach? "Puke puddle." Yeah, we already established that. Speaking of -- one time I came across a puddle of puke right outside the bar and you know what I did? "Notified a bouncer to clean it up?" Wrote my initials in it with a stick. Thanks to Rev Dr Dom, who's still not convinced some mermaid didn't just overdo it on seaweed wine and blow chunks.



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